RyanHarne.com

Working is a curious thing in our culture. To some it holds the key to living - to others it is the drudge that keeps them in bed Monday morning. Neither approach is wrong. It is not necessarily correct to maintain the standard, American Protestant work ethic that working hard will bring a great bounty and greater relief; that is a piece of culture, not a natural law.

I always try to enjoy my work. From the days of frying onion rings, to scanning documents, to helping students, to doing research, to today’s assortment of research and teaching tasks, I look for something to make tedious tasks, or barely appealing tasks, more manageable. But, as I get closer to full-on graduate research and teachingstuffs, I want to make sure I am doing what I want to do. I don’t believe that working as hard as possible, no matter what chore it may be, will bring me happiness, nor do I believe that a salary and vacations and consumer products could compensate for an insufferable work environment. My desk must be a sort-of extension of the enjoyment of home.

In Mechanical Engineering at Virginia Tech, graduate students shoot for acquiring either a GTA (graduate teaching assistant[ship]) or a GRA (research assistant) because it pays for everything and provides a pays-the-bills stipend. As I’ve clearly become more attached to research efforts, a GRA is more appealing. Even more so when considering that with a GTA I would be consumed with taking care of students and grading their work and tossing around their emails before I was able to work on my own research; it seems that being a GTA is almost two jobs, whereas a GRA thrusts you straight towards your degree and a greater depth in the research.

I discovered that state budget cuts are severely limiting the number of GTAs that VT’s ME Dept. will dole out and my search for a GRA became even more intense. Unfortunately, my main sources of acoustics professors seemed to have no new funding to speak of. Within hours of getting these negative replies, my hopes sunk to ground level. Per recommendation of another professor, I began writing some emails to be sent to ME professors outside of the Vibrations and Acoustics Lab for a potential GRA in their field. But that would be a prime example of forcing myself to swallow a job that didn’t suit my taste; and, when it comes to research, a certain dedication is necessary in order to have any success and fulfillment. You can’t mindlessly crunch numbers in a research area for long until you start going postal.

To my luck, and entirely serendipitously, I discovered that an acoustics professor not only has new funding but, after a quick discussion with him, may very well want me on board this new project. We meet tomorrow to talk about specifics and my own research interests. There is no certainty to this meeting, only potential. Still, potential is what I need right now, not waiting for a GTA offer letter that may or may not arrive. And, with work in acoustics, I can work in a field that I intended on pursuing anyways. Win-win. So, we’ll see.

I had to check to see when the last time was that I had written here. The intervening time has been no less than enjoyable, exhausting, and educational. The spring break period was mainly spent in Atlanta with Becky, both of us doing our share of work across the table. So, of course, that period was enjoyable. Then, I was in Philadelphia for a cross-conference cycling race, look for ECCC week 2 in the link. Those 3 days were exhausting due to the traveling, the torrential rains, and the frigid & wind-battered races. Fortunately, the team time trial Sunday, though absolutely freezing, was exciting and encouraging. Finally, the academic sphere of my life has been working overtime to make up for… well, not making up for anything in particular. Maybe academics is always running at a pace just greater than my endurance threshold. Likely so.

On March 4, one of my Atlanta days last week, ryanharne.com celebrated its 5th birthday. I had known that the anniversary would fall during my trip, but my company kept my rapt attention during the Atlantatime so that I misplaced the event reminder. Perhaps I will celebrate this evening, marking the 5th year and 1st week of ryanharne.com. You should, too.

As a final point, while in Atlanta I drink coffee each morning that I make from a french press. That method of preparation can turn a crap cup of coffee into a delicious, crema-covered brew. I ended up buying a french press for home use after my first Atlanta visit but making it at my home is inconvenient because we don’t have a steaming water tap. I have to boil the water on the stove before I can get the brew going. If anyone knows of a cheap way to quickly steam water, not involving the microwave, then please pass along your tip.

Ok. Some engineering students are probably wanting some system dynamics help. Afterwards, be confident that I will celebrate ryanharne.com’s 5th&1.

Spring break is apparently approaching but my break will coalesce in the form of a class-less week; work is never over in graduate education, it seems. Granted, I’ll be in Atlanta with Becky for part of the week, but I still have a growing amount of work to accomplish over those days. Having discovered some local bike routes in that area, I am anticipating some new cycling scenery during my visit. The routes warn of 5,000 feet of climbing for a certain 50-mile ride. It’s a laughable amount since I am nestled in the Appalachian Mountains of Virginia where 50 miles of riding from Blacksburg could accumulate 7,000 feet of climbing. Oh well, at least there’s a thriving cycling community in that area, too. They also have that big, annual race.

Most of my time lately has become swamped with academic deadlines and not enjoying myself on the bike. Riding conditions - precipitation, temperatures, the number of angry Monday-morning drivers - haven’t been too favorable lately, so my motivation for riding is less than it really should, given that the racing season has already begun. Fortunately, knowing that I am not riding enough and then watching all of the live Tour of California footage last week serves as encouragement to suit up.

The new VT team kit was delivered last week and we all discovered that the white of the bibs/shorts becomes see-through with the right amount of moisture. Today’s morning ride in the rain made me pause and think about how much people can see of me from behind as water is splashed up to my butt from the rear tire. Luckily, there isn’t too much white in the back of the bibs, mainly just on the side. When cruising around town after a hard training ride, you imagine yourself as being the cool spaceman, aptly dressed, atop your carbon steed, that all of the simpleton college students and locals ogle at; the thought that your shorts might be see-through makes you unnecessarily self-conscious and ruins the fantasy. But at least I had a really good ride today, thanks to a second bike that is capable of accepting the punishing conditions of wet roads and a myriad of splashback.

With the spring semester in full … swing … I am once again immersed in research objectives. Last semester was based on acoustic localization methods but this time around I am working on noise cancellation. Similar to the techniques utilized by Bose for their Quiet Comfort headphones, I am in charge of a portion of a project where I must actively cancel out engine noise without the convenience of having a error-correcting microphone in the mix. This has been done before but is protected under the watchful eye of the USPTO, so my solution has to be novel and ignorant of the past successes in the field. In actuality, many people at VT know how to do this, several within the very lab I work in, but I have opted to struggle along with this new area until time constraints encourage my begging for assistance. It’s far more fulfilling to solve a problem under your own diligence, even if it has been solved a million times before. (Why learn calculus in the modern world of computers? Self-satisfaction, that’s why).

So, that’s how I’ve begun dissolving into academia this semester. Cycling is taking a prominent stage, but certainly not my focus. Were the weather kinder, I’m sure I would be on the bike more, but an hour+ at the gym is enough for me while the temperatures remain at freezing or below. I have hardly lost my love for cycling, but I am not willing to put myself at risk of further frostbite if it is unnecessary. My paychecks in the future will come from somewhere other than UCI, I’m certain of it. I hope to be a weekend group rider, in my later years, who can smoke the invincible freshmen attitudes and put a stopper on their hopes of le Tour. They’ll thank me later for that wake-up call.

And, finally, on a totally unrelated note, I’ve discovered that I enjoy the click of an analog wall clock. Mine isn’t even telling the correct time, but the regular tap of the second hand is more than enough soothing normalcy to make up for the misinformation. What a great Tuesday.

When I make it to the halls of academia in the role of a professor, I will be sure to reinforce to students the value of education, not only in the gateway-to-the-future sense but also in financial terms. One professor I had in my sophomore year gave every student, on the last day of class, a breakdown of what it costs per hour to attend Virginia Tech. In-state students pay roughly $53 per hour, or that same amount per lecture.

One professor I have this semester is known for being absent a lot - for conferences in Orlando, for some research competition, for whatever. I knew this would happen once again, but I’ve thus far kept up the naïve hope that he may value his graduate students in class as much as his funding sources. Alas, he has now suddenly disappeared and we have no lectures this week. Great. I hear he’s a wonderful professor to have with your own research but he’s received the second lowest teacher evaluation I could ever hand out. The story of the lowest evaluation is painful to recall and will be done at another time.

Plus, the “recorded and posted” lectures are nowhere to be found. Unsurprising, really. I could foreseeably continue griping about this outrage until the end of the regular course period, but will instead soothe myself with some quick cycling and acoustics books.

Let this be my great thanks to the many engineering professors who are both timely and prepared for class. Exactly as you would wish for us.

As I have pushed through the semesters, my academic motivation has inflected a number of times. The last 2 semesters were a rough road of dissatisfaction with my effort - even though I found the topics interesting, there wasn’t a significant amount of inner drive propelling me from lecture to assignment to project and back again. It was hard to rev my academic engine with the fuel of creative endeavor and engineering discovery.

From this first week of this semester’s work, I have focused on recovering that energy. In the near future, I will be on an entirely different academic spectrum that requires an uncommon focus and determination. I can’t get there on easy street. I’d inevitably crash and burn on the altar of graduate education.

This morning was set aside for some acoustics derivations, originally performed in the 1950s, but due for my class - just 7 students - this coming Monday afternoon. After an hour of painful coffee-bingeing in hopes of mathematical epiphanies, a point was reached when my understanding of the math materialized and rapidly multiplied. Then, the lightbulb moment.

As an engineering student, you aren’t taught to have lightbulb moments. You’re taught to develop an uncanny pattern recognition, finely tuned for ideal problems but poorly focused for the real world, and even less adept at innovation. My very first talk to my professor about graduate work was met with his encouraging devil’s advocacy, warning me that graduate students were nothing like undergraduates. They possessed a spirit not openly marketed but manifest when the round peg doesn’t immediately fall into the square hole. My professor inspired me to start reading a variety of scientific literature and pursuing anything academic not simply to buffer my future schooling prowess but also for a well-rounded perspective with which to view problems.

Having followed his advice for a time, I then slumped into a terrible academic depression when non-engineering topics interested me the most, save for those periods when my acoustics research absorbed me. Perhaps today’s lightbulb moment is a sign of things to come. If anything, the adrenaline resulting from such an epiphany is enough to cruise with until my next breakthrough. I expect small steps, but the big leaps are helpful after a long depression.

After writing all of this, I don’t feel like doing much more work tonight, if any. It has already been a long day. Plus, it’s rather cold outside. This is a prime time for sweats, a novel, and a comfortable chair. We work hard but we play hard.