and out came this calf
In the same spirit of Michelle Pfeiffer’s character in I Am Sam, I am learning how to get exercise in the most unusual of settings. Rita Harrison darted up several flights of stairs to maintain a 120 bpm pulse traveling from client meeting to client meeting, and I’ve discovered a way to build muscle while not even realizing.
That’s right, folks; another one of lives great endeavors, exercise, has been mastered to the extent that we no longer have to realize we are doing it. Calves just happen to be my muscular nemesis, as it is with some people not gifted in that area. Those with calves should flaunt them, because there are many who simply have trouble producing any muscle behind their shins.
I asked a friend how he works out his calves and he said he runs. Well, if that’s the case, I should have bronze calves - something ancient Israelites would have gladly bowed down to. He next pointed out that he uses stair machines frequently. Hmm. Stairs… stairs, you say? I certainly don’t see many natural stairs during my day, not in Lynchburg, at least.
So I thought. And thought. How can I walk stairs; well, where could I even find them? There are scarcely few stairs in Lynchburg, as people prefer spreading outward when more space in needed. So there must be an alternative. Still thinking… well, stair machines make you extend your calf. Standing in your tip-toes makes you extend your calf too. Uh.. I’m seeing a correlation here.
My connections didn’t stop there. I stand up a lot during the day, walking from place to place, but more so just standing (this is all at the job, of course; not school; school is for long-distance walking). So, I’ve decided to stand on my tip-toes at work when the time allows it. And after a while of this attempted exercise and stretching, the strangest thing happened:
I had forgotten I was standing on my tip-toes. So when I relaxed my legs, there was a significant loss of tension; meaning that I had been stretching them and extending them to their limit and holding that position for a great length of time - the same effect as using a stair machine, somewhat. I’ve discovered a way to not realize you’re becoming healthier.
Kind of like eating your way to being thin - the results without the work. There are a lot of things that people desire, or even do, that make little sense when being viewed after the matter. Is there no end to the madness? No. The answer is no.
August 12th, 2005 at 5:15 am
Eating yourself thin makes no sense. Take it from me. Why continue the madness? Often times the irrational parts of our persona take over and try to accomplish our goals mindlessly (and sometimes mindfullyl). If only more people listened to the rational bits of themselves slightly more than their irrational instincts.
August 12th, 2005 at 1:31 pm
I love love love Neutral Milk Hotel.
But standing on your tiptoes still is not the same as a stair master. The stairs (and also certain treadmills) provide an incline so your body has to work harder to propel itself forward, thus burning more energy and sculpting your legs (but mostly your butt). You are stretching your tendons, yes, but not necessarily sculpting your calves like you want to.
We can be work out buddies if you want. I love love love to run… I’m just a little out of shape, though. :-\
August 12th, 2005 at 11:13 pm
Laken - NMH is ok, but good; just not in my desired taste. I understand that standing on tip-toes is not the same as a stairmaster/whatever, but the idea of being able to work my calves, even to the slightest extent, was my main goal. Perhaps, we could work out too; I’m not sure if I will end up going to Memorial or McComas more often, though. Most likely, even though it is uber-distant compared to Memorial, I will go to McComas because it is so, so huge. Anyways.